Cavalcade of Whimsy: Coaches Getting Fired, Alabama Historic Loss, Greg Schiano

Cavalcade of Whimsy: Coaches Getting Fired, Alabama Historic Loss, Greg Schiano

College Football Cavalcade

Cavalcade of Whimsy: Coaches Getting Fired, Alabama Historic Loss, Greg Schiano


The world of coaching changes, Alabama’s big loss, and the hiring of Greg Schiano, in the latest Cavalcade of Whimsy.

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Sorry if this column sucks, it’s not my fault …

This could be Shakespeare, Tolstoy, Hemingway and Monty Python all wrapped up in one column, and it would still have no shot of kicking it all off with half the swag of this …

“Right after I got here, I ordered some spaghetti with marinara sauce and I got egg noodles and ketchup. I’m an average nobody. I get to live the rest of my life like a schnook.”

One doinked field goal attempt, an illegal substitution penalty, a friendly clock at the end of the first half, a Butt Pick Six, another interception for a score, and go ahead and throw in the horrible injury to an all-timer of a starting quarterback that shouldn’t have been in the game a few weeks earlier … that’s what it took to finally kill this Alabama thing.

At least for this year.

Even with no wins over any teams ranked in the College Football Playoff top 25.

Even with the 98th best strength of schedule according to the NCAA model.

Even with two losses, and three worthy 11-1 Power Five programs to choose from for one, maybe two spots, there’s still this thought in the minds of many that somehow, someway, the Crimson Tide are still in the running for the national championship.

And here’s the punchline. I guarantee you with 1000% certainty that the Ed, Ryan and Dabo would all rather have Oklahoma, Utah or Baylor to face than a Bama team with the talent that could absolutely win two games in the mini-tournament.

But the Tide are out – they have to be, or the College Football Playoff system has to delete its account.

So now Alabama is just another amazing SEC team that had a fantastic season with absolutely nothing to show for it.

Now it gets to know how LSU, and Texas A&M when it had Johnny Manziel, and Ole Miss when it was doing its thing under Hugh Freeze, and Georgia other than the 2017 season, and Florida, and everyone else feel around this time of year.

By all reasonable and normal standards, going 10-2 is terrific. But when you’re that one missed kick, those few mental errors, and that one quarterback loss away from being 11-1 and – let’s be honest here – probably in the show again, it’s devastating.

How absolutely historic was that loss to Auburn? Try this out.

That defeat made it Alabama’s first two-loss regular season since 2010. To take this eight-year run even further, this is the first time Bama has lost its second game before its bowl season, with six SEC championships along the way.

What did Auburn just do? Before the the loss in the Iron Bowl, Alabama was 114-8 over the last nine seasons in games before losing its second game in year, if it did lose twice.

To take this even further, since Nick Saban got Bama rocking in 2008, over the last 12 years, Alabama is 147-10 in games before losing its second game in a season.

How hard is this to do? Clemson is on a run of five straight years without losing two games in the regular season. Oklahoma is on a three-year run. Ohio State has only gone two years doing that.

And now, this is just the third time since 2008 that Bama is playing in a bowl game with no national championship implications, so …

CFN Playoff Rankings Reaction …

“The thing is, Bob, it’s not that I’m lazy, it’s that I just don’t care.”

There’s going to be no more interesting bowl team to handicap than Alabama.

It’s not going to the College Football Playoff, and now, for the first time since 2013, it’s last game of the season will be utterly meaningless.

How did Bama do after suffering the Kick Six against Auburn six years ago? Trevor Knight looked like Aaron Rodgers in Oklahoma’s Sugar Bowl win over the Tide.

That was the only bowl game since 2010 for Bama that didn’t have national championship implications.

That 9-3 2010 team showed up in the Capital One Bowl and annihilated Michigan State 49-7, but the 2008 team that got Tebowed in the SEC Championship – after a 12-0 start – didn’t show up against Utah in the 2008 Sugar Bowl.

Which leads to this big problem …

NEXT: Thanks for playing, everyone. It’s been a slice.

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