It’s mid-August, and the Sun Belt already slaps
The Sun Belt has been unusually dramatic for an August.
The Georgia Southern Eagles opened Fall camp a couple weeks ago by announcing that its dual-threat starting quarterback, redshirt junior Shai Werts, was suspended from the team after getting arrested for speeding (oh no) and POSSESSION OF COCAINE (yikes!). Did the arresting officers find a sandwich baggie of blow in the glove box? Nope. For some reason, a big white splotch on the hood of Werts’ car tested positive for narcotics.
The “cocaine” looked suspiciously (and exactly) like big bird shit, but that didn’t stop officers from giving Werts the ol’ cuff-n-stuff.
“I play football. I don’t do cocaine,” said Werts during his arrest, but maybe a more convincing defense would be, “Dude, what kind of wasteful goober leaves a COCAINE STAIN on the hood of his car?”
Werts was reinstated by the Eagles a week later when the stain turned out to be bird poop after all.
Yet, somebody in the Sun Belt who might be under the influence of mind-altering chemicals. Louisiana Ragin’ Cajuns head coach Billy Napier is demanding that every member of the football team (except for walk-ons) contribute $50 to the Ragin’ Cajun Athletic Foundation, according to the Acadiana Advocate.
“It’s about gratitude,” said Napier, who pulls in $850,000 per season from ULL. What next, Coach? A kidney?
Finally, we have this footage from Texas State to contemplate:
August is supposed to be for wondering just how terrific Alabama will be, or covering Jim Harbough’s milk consumption. But this August is owned by the Sun Belt. Deal with it.
UPDATE: Since posting this story, the $50 donation drama at Louisiana has evolved.
UPDATE TO THE UPDATE: Sounds like SOMEBODY might have threatened to cancel a newspaper subscription.
A former notary public, Jeremy Harper is a professional writer and Chief Instigator for Storm the Castle Creative. He spends much of his free time staring blankly into space.