Cavalcade of Whimsy: Ohio State Is Okay, Michigan Wins A Big Game, UCF & The CFP

Cavalcade of Whimsy: Ohio State Is Okay, Michigan Wins A Big Game, UCF & The CFP

Cavalcade of Whimsy

Cavalcade of Whimsy: Ohio State Is Okay, Michigan Wins A Big Game, UCF & The CFP


Even after that, Ohio State should be okay, Michigan won a big game, UCF and the CFP, and the big things to take away from Week 8 … in the Cavalcade of Whimsy.


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Sorry if this column sucks, it’s not my fault …

This column is “the opposite of BS” …

I know, I know … Shhhhhhh. Silence.

Seriously, people. Have you not seen Ohio State football before?

Ohhhhhh, suuuuuuure, it’s a whole lot of fun to frolic around with unbridled glee as the school that puts football above all else soiled itself in front of a nation of millions.

But really? Don’t you know how this works?

2014. Ohio State got shocked at home by Virginia Tech in a crippling 35-21 loss. And that was it … season over, Urban can’t coach, the program is overrated, fundamental changes need to be made, wayward Ohio State people wander the streets in search of a purpose.

And then Zeke and the kids ripped off 13 straight and won the national title.

Last season, the Buckeyes were obliterated at Iowa 55-24. And that was it … season over, Urban can’t coach, the program is overrated, fundamental changes need to be made, wayward Ohio State people wander the streets in search of a purpose.

And the week after, Ohio State wiped the floor with Michigan State – back when Michigan State was healthy, and good – 48-3 on the way to five straight wins to close out the season, including a double-digit victory over Michigan, a Big Ten Championship over unbeaten Wisconsin, and a total domination of USC in the Cotton Bowl.

And now, the season is over, Urban can’t coach, the program is overrated, fundamental changes need to be made, wayward Ohio State people are wandering the streets in search of a purpose, and … the Buckeyes lost because Dwayne Haskins isn’t a runner?!

They have two NFL running backs in JK Dobbins and Mike Weber to handle the ball – were Haskins’ 470 passing yards and third straight game of over 400 yards really a problem for anyone?

Purdue wins 49-20, and there’s a neuron firing somewhere on this planet that the blowout had something to do with the OSU offense not working in more RPOs.

Wait … I’ve just been handed this …

DWAYNE HASKINS IS A BETTER QUARTERBACK THAN J.T. BARRETT.

But I digress. Sorry. Here’s another fun thing floated out there.

Ohio State was unfocused because Nick Bosa doesn’t want to do something stupid like play more college football?

You know who else doesn’t want to play college football at Ohio State and would rather get ready for the NFL Draft?

EVERYONE WHO HAS EVER PLAYED COLLEGE FOOTBALL AT OHIO STATE.

People, people … come on now.

Ohio State is going to beat Nebraska by a gajillion. It’s almost certainly going to win at Michigan State and at Maryland, and then it’ll beat Michigan – I’ll temper this one; the Wolverines might finally pull this off, but I’m working here – on the way to the Big Ten Championship and the College Football Playoff.

Forget record and forget what has actually happened on the field. This is one of the four most talented and best teams in college football – along with Alabama, Georgia and Clemson. It absolutely has the ability to win seven straight and take down a second national title in five years.

But so does Georgia.

For all the weeping and gnashing of teeth out there by the Buckeye nation, this is one area of genuine concern.

Alabama and Clemson go unbeaten, Notre Dame goes 12-0, Oklahoma or Texas go 12-1 with a Big 12 title – Ohio State is out of the CFP.

OR, Georgia, Florida or Kentucky get to the SEC Championship at 11-1 and beats unbeaten Alabama, and two SEC teams get in.

OR, LSU beats Alabama and wins the SEC title, and Bama goes 11-1.

Ohio State fans, you really, really, really need and want the Crimson Tide to go 13-0, and you want this Notre Dame foolishness to stop toot sweet.

Something will happen – Notre Dame really will lose and/or Alabama will go unbeaten and/or a two-loss team will shock the world in the ACC or Big 12 title games.

You’re fine, Ohio State. Everything is okay. Teams that have won 12 games and a Power Five conference championship are 13-for-13 at getting into the College Football playoff.

Unless you lose to Michigan. In which case … season over, Urban can’t coach, the program is overrated, fundamental changes need to be made, wayward Ohio State people wander the streets in search of a purpose.

NEXT: College football gets this one right

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