Cavalcade of Whimsy: The Wild, Crazy, Historic Start For All The New Coaches

Cavalcade of Whimsy: The Wild, Crazy, Historic Start For All The New Coaches

College Football Cavalcade

Cavalcade of Whimsy: The Wild, Crazy, Historic Start For All The New Coaches


Savannah State … here’s pulling for you, you paycheck warriors, you … 

Who doesn’t love kicking a coach, or a fan base, or a program while they’re down? Apparently, everyone – it’s why social media exists.

And I’m 100% for stomping all over a pro team full of guys getting paid – you had better soon turn into Bill Belichick/Vince Lombardi/Pete Bell all wrapped into one smirky little rich package, Jon Gruden.

But college kids? Yeah, yeah, yeah, scholarship, room & board, etc. – the 2018 Kansas Jayhawks aren’t about to stock the NFL with fresh bodies. They deserve to have a little bit of fun, too.

Seriously, good for you, Kansas.

After starting out the year with a 26-23 loss to Nicholls State, the 31-7 win over Central Michigan to break a streak of 46 straight road losses was fantastic.

And while it’s always embarrassing for the losing side, Central Michigan went bowling last year. The players got a bag full of NCAA-approved cash and prizes. They’re fine.

Good for you, Eastern Michigan.

The program went from 1996 to 2010 without winning more than four games, and had just one season with more than five wins from 1996 until it went bowling in 2016. It regressed with a 5-7 2017, and this year it was supposed to need a bit of a rebuilding job – how does a team go on without Hard Knocks star Brogan Roback and his snacks? – and then … it just beat Purdue.

Those Eagle players are going to bore the (bleep) out of generations of family members talking about that comeback victory.

Good for you, Kentucky.

No one – I repeat, NO ONE – beats the UK football program 32 times in a row. The Wildcats lost in just about every way imaginable to Florida for more than three decades, and now the reset button has been pressed.

Good for you, East Carolina.

The 2014 team won eight games and went bowling, and then the program fell into the abyss. Scottie Montgomery started out with two 3-9 seasons, opened up with a loss to North Carolina A&T, and then, just when he was on the Hot Seat list of the TOTALLY fired … 41-19 over North Carolina.

So in an upcoming week full of listless matchups and massive point spreads, pray to the college football patron saint of lost and desperate causes for more miracles.

By the way, UTEP is making a trip to Tennessee.

NEXT: Oh you nasty teams …


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