Week 9

Week 9 Final Thoughts, Predictions & Investment Advice


Check out the final thoughts, a few predictions, and some investment advice – because you have to.


Week 9 College Football Final Thoughts, Predictions & Advice

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Week 9 Fearless Predictions & Game Previews 
ACC | Big Ten | Big 12 | Pac-12 | SEC
AAC | C-USA | Ind | MACM-West | Sun Belt

Follow @ColFootballNews to get the latest picks and previews

– Week 9 Expert Picks | Week 9 TV Schedule

For those of you explaining to your significant other why you broke something tasteful after Davis Webb inexplicably threw two worthless checkdown passes instead of putting either of his final two passes into the end zone against USC – and especially for those of you who stayed up late and know what I’m talking about – I’m here, welcoming you into a college football hug.

It’s not your fault … it’s not your fault …

This is all just for spits, giggles, and entertainment purposes only. However, just in case you dabble …

I’ve been hurt before, South Florida. Just when I started to believe that we had something special, you come up with that against Temple?! I wish I knew how to quit you – the Bulls will get their groove back at home against Navy.

Never, ever, ever revenge pick. Unless you have issues you need to get over – Gunner Kiel and Cincinnati will get back at Temple for me.

Donnel Pumphrey should run for well over 100 yards when San Diego State takes on Utah State, and the Aztec run defense should shut down the Aggie ground game to a dead stop. But this isn’t an explosive SDSU attack – it’s going to be a fight.

What have we learned this year when it comes to new coaches on the fly? Whether it’s FIU, or LSU, or even a competitive Purdue, the team tends to perk up when the substitute teacher takes over. Fresno State is going to do just that against a dying Air Force team that suddenly forgot how to tackle, and then the Bulldog new coach sugar high will wear off, and Fresno State will be Fresno State again.

Pick a number between 1 and 10. “6” … no, try again. “3” … nooooo. “7” … nope. “2” … colder … “9” … red hot! … “10” … ooooh, too ambitious. … “8” … correct!

I’ve now just described me picking Texas every single fricking week – I got the win over Notre Dame, whatever – until I get this right. And, of course, Iowa State doesn’t count.

I just refuse to believe that a team with so much upside can be this bad. Texas secondary, show up against an okay-not-great 6-0 Baylor.

Your 2016 Eastern Michigan Eagles have the puck on their stick with a chance for bowl eligibility, at home, against a punchless Miami University team. Don’t be all Eastern Michiganey, Eastern Michigan. If you’re really that good, you win this by more than a touchdown.

God help you and your loved ones if you really and truly believe you have a firm grip on what’s going to happen between a dying UConn and a sinking ship East Carolina.

Not only will the Aggies win when New Mexico State goes to Texas A&M, but they’ll cover.

I know, not even a little bit funny. Frightfully sorry. Don’t be stunned, though, if the Sun Belt version hangs around just enough to make the SEC version just miss on the 44 points it’ll need to make everyone happy.

FIU starting QB Alex McGough is fine for the game against Middle Tennessee, but he doesn’t play defensive back. The Blue Raiders will roll.

WKU, why do you tempt us so as a 21- point favorite against a bad, bad, bad, bad Florida Atlantic? Something’s off here – it opened at 21.5 and hasn’t really moved. The Hilltoppers should win by 30 if they open it up.

Don’t think, just throw. Go with the muscle memory here – Wake Forest’s defense will own Army. The spread should be double the Demon Deacons -7.

Don’t fall for the market trap. Neither defense is any good, and anyone who saw last week’s debacle will think this is easy, but no, Texas Tech and TCU aren’t going to combine for more than 87.5 points.

OOOOOOOOklahoma where the wins come sweeping down the plain – but not at -40.5. Don’t aggravate yourself. It could just as easily be a 66-3 OU win over Kansas as it could be a go-through-the-motions 44-10 play-and-move-on performance from the Sooners.

–  Pick of the week I’m totally, completely 100% wrong on, going the other way on the actual selection for the site, but I’m going to tell it you anyway just because I think it could actually happen and I’d be doing the American public a disservice if I didn’t. Watch out for Purdue at home vs. Penn State. Straight up.

I’m sick of trying to figure out which Indiana will show up, and I’m sick of trying to figure out which Maryland will show up, and since the two are playing, I’m just going to be sick trying to figure out both of them.

Yeah, go ahead with Louisville -33 on the road vs. Virginia. Even if you’re wrong, you’re probably right – if that makes any sense whatsoever.

Even after missing just about everything Sun Belt related all year, South Alabama -5 against Georgia State = layup.

Kent State is awful at playing college football, but that defense is 15 points stronger than a Central Michigan offense that’s been sputtering way too much lately.

Florida State is going to beat Clemson. Clemson is better, and it’s going to end up in the College Football Playoff, but the Noles will somehow pull this off at home. This will look like the team we thought it’d be.

There’s absolutely nothing flaky about this Kansas State team. It’s going to be boring, and it’s going to be workmanlike, but it’ll also take care of Iowa State without an issue.

It’s a shame the NC State/BC over/under went from 48 to 45, but it’ll still be a low scoring game.

West Virginia won’t go 12-0, but it’s not losing to this Oklahoma State team, either.

Enough of whatever this is, Fighting Irish. Quit analyzing, quit motivating, quit everything. You’re rested and ready for this. Take care of a wounded Miami team and salvage this season.

Underappreciated and really, really fun conference game that you’re not going to watch even though it matters. Tulsa and Memphis will put on a wild and crazy show. The two passing games are going to go off.

SMU just shut down the Houston running game to a dead stop. It was a total fluke, but ride the momentum against a Tulane team that’s still trying to find its place in this world.

If you’re going to be this yippie and this weird, Mike Leach, then your team had better be interesting enough to beat an Oregon State team with NO offense by more than 13. The Cougar defensive front will take care of business.

Really? You’re going to stay up until 3 in the morning on the East Coast to find out the result of Stanford-Arizona? Fine. The Cardinal will get it done against an Arizona team that just can’t seem to get anything going.

Let me put it this way. With how well Northwestern has been playing over the last few weeks, if Ohio State wins by more than 27.5 points, then that Penn State gack really was a total and complete fluke.

Does Nebraska do any one thing well enough to beat Wisconsin? It’s all about the red zone O for the Badgers. If Bucky can stop screwing up inside the 20 – and doesn’t do something stupid like turn the ball over in key spots – it’ll make the Huskers look like Iowa did last week.

Georgia Tech’s defense will have as much to do with a relatively easy win over Duke as the offense.

Every X and O, and everything analytical says to Florida is going to win the Cocktail Party. So, of course, Georgia is the correct answer.

Look, even if you’re wrong taking Auburn -4.5 over Ole Miss, after what the Tiger O did last week to Arkansas, you’re insane not to at least give it a try. The Rebel run defense is abysmal.

Look, even if you’re wrong taking UCF +9.5 over Houston, after the way the Cougars have played the last three weeks, you’re insane not to at least give it a try. You don’t lose that badly to SMU if everything is hunky dory.

South … Carolina … doesn’t … score. Don’t work too hard on this one. The Gamecocks can’t and won’t put up more than 17 points on Tennessee.

Rice is awful. Louisiana Tech isn’t. The Owls have allowed 42 points or more four times this year, and the Bulldogs have scores 42 points or more five times, and 53 or more three times. Do with that what you will.

Very, very, very, very, very scared of Boise State going to Wyoming. I’ve been Bronco Boy all year, but this is a quirky-confident-playing Cowboy team getting 14 at home in what might be the biggest game in Laramie in more than a decade.

If death is not an option, then fine. Assume Missouri is going to find something that works and it wins a mini-shootout against Kentucky. I’ll take the Tigers, but that doesn’t mean I have to like it.

No matter where you go with this Michigan State -24.5 against Michigan, at home, in a rivalry of rivalry games, you’re wrong, and you’re going to be mad that the outcome will be so obvious.

With the way Michigan State is playing, this could be a cathartic 58-0 wipeout, but if it’s me, and if I HAD to pick – which I do – really, you’re giving me the Spartans down by more than three touchdowns at home? As the Cubs say, accept the walk.

Washington isn’t going 12-0. If it doesn’t lose to Utah this week, it’ll lose to USC. But it’ll lose to Utah this week.

It’s flaky, but go ahead. UNLV has allowed four sacks this year. Four. San Jose State has allowed 74 tackles for loss. The Rebels will win on the road against a punchless Spartan team.

AND FINALLY …

It starts at 12:00 in the very, very AM on the East Coast. New Mexico has scored 45 or more four times this year, Hawaii has scored 31 or more six times. Take the 66 point over, stick it under your pillow, and if you go to sleep, the chasing fairy will have something special for you when you wake up.

Week 9 Fearless Predictions & Game Previews 
ACC | Big Ten | Big 12 | Pac-12 | SEC
AAC | C-USA | Ind | MACM-West | Sun Belt

Follow @ColFootballNews to get the latest picks and previews

– Week 9 Expert Picks | Week 9 TV Schedule